Many believers know the frustration: A powerful encounter with God, surrender at the altar, even years of ministry training—yet relapse strikes again. Sobriety comes, but peace doesn’t. The cycle repeats.
What if relapse isn’t God’s plan for you? What if the issue isn’t His power—but our willingness to embrace the costly grace that leads to maturity?
Curtis Palaski grew up in dysfunction—abuse, drugs at 14, multiple rehabs by high school graduation. No church background. Jesus was just a figure on a cross.
Then, at 19, a persistent woman kept crossing his path: “God has a plan for your life.”
August 17, 1997: Curtis walked into church. Felt something pulling at his heart. Responded to the altar call. As he prayed, warmth filled him from feet to head. Uncontrollable tears. Broken. Undone.
Saved. Discipled. Master’s Commission. Forerunner School of Ministry at IHOP-KC. Credentialed. Married. Called to ministry.
But three major relapses followed—even as a believer. Pills. Heroin. Loss of family. Isolation.
In 2016, desperate and sick of the cycle, Curtis entered a faith-based long-term program. Seven months in, everything shifted.
Today, Curtis directs a men’s Hope Home for City Reach in Cumberland, Maryland—discipling broken men, leading worship, preaching. Restored relationship with his daughter. Walking in wholeness like never before.
His story exposes the lie that “you’ll always struggle.” Through embracing trials as refinement, returning to first-love intimacy, and raw discipleship, Curtis found lasting freedom.
If you’re a believer stuck in relapse—or leading others who are—this testimony shows: God finishes what He starts. Costly grace leads to maturity and purpose.
The Early Years: Dysfunction, Drugs, and Divine Pursuit
Curtis grew up in verbal and physical abuse. Drugs started at 14—drinking, marijuana. Senior year: First rehab (secular). Barely graduated.
No faith foundation. Dad nominally Catholic—prayed privately. Jesus irrelevant.
In rehab, a woman tried connecting: “You have a Bible? I’ll pray for you.”
Out of rehab—back to drugs.
Ran into her again at a restaurant. “I’ve been praying. God has a plan.”
Curtis: “You’re weird.” Took her number. Never called.
Weeks later—at aftercare—she chased him down the street. Same message.
Months passed. She showed up at his parents’ house every Sunday. Curtis locked his door, blasted music, cursed her out.
But God pursued.
The Encounter: August 17, 1997
Curtis finally went to church with her—Assemblies of God in Pittsburgh.
Pastor: “If God’s tugging your heart, respond.”
Curtis felt it—like something pulling inside.
Prayer led. Warmth filled him—feet to head. Snot-nosed weeping. Undone.
Saved. Discipled in youth group. Radical change.
Two years Master’s Commission. Year and a half at Forerunner School of Ministry (IHOP-KC). Credentialed through Global University.
Married in Kansas City. First child (Adala, now 18).
Ministry calling strong.
The Cycles: Relapse Even as a Believer
Despite salvation and training, stress hit hard.
Marriage strains. Lost first pregnancy. Life pressures.
Compromise crept in: Drinks here, marijuana there.
Three major relapses over years.
Pills → heroin.
Church attendance faded. Isolated. Paying bills, holding it together—barely.
Wife left (2015/2016). Took daughter.
Curtis: “I turned my back—not rebelled against God, just stopped pursuing.”
Fear of man. False identity. Condemnation. Unworthy.
Secular rehabs (10–12 total). Temporary fixes.
The Breaking Point: Long-Term Faith-Based Recovery
2016: Heroin bottom.
Entered Pittsburgh City Reach Hope Home—faith-based, long-term.
Finally ready: “Sick and tired of being sick and tired.”
Seven months in: God speaking daily. Journals full of promises, identity reminders.
Founder and leaders met him: “Share what God’s doing.”
Presence filled the room. Tears everywhere.
Next day: “Pack your bags. You’re directing the Cumberland men’s Hope Home.”
The Difference: Embracing Costly Grace and Trials
What changed?
Curtis reached desperation: “No matter where I run, You pursue me. You say I’m qualified, chosen.”
Realization: “He who started this work will finish it” (Philippians 1:6).
No more running from the call.
Trials as joy (James 1:2–4): Testing produces perseverance → maturity.
Peter’s sifting (Luke 22:31–32). Satan overplays—draws us closer to Christ.
Secret place intimacy: Returning to first love. Abiding. Beholding His beauty (Psalm 27:4).
Nothing separates from His love (Romans 8:38–39).
Raw discipleship: Living life together—struggles, pains, victories.
Raw Discipleship: The Early Church Model in Recovery
City Reach Hope Homes: Men/women live together. Eat, work, worship together. Needs met communally.
Mirrors Acts 2 early church.
Sunday services alone can’t match the depth.
Curtis directs men’s home: “Raw discipleship. Real emotions, strongholds, psychological battles.”
Vulnerability modeled: “I’m in the fight too. Further down the road—but still walking it.”
Church must create safe spaces: Admit struggles without fear.
Transparency heals isolation.
Body of Christ surrounds when leaders admit weakness.
Practical Steps for Breaking Relapse Cycles in Faith-Based Recovery
If relapse marks your walk—or you’re discipling others—here’s Curtis’ (and the conversation’s) battle-tested path:
Reach True Desperation Get sick of the cycle. “My way fails. Lord, take my crappy life—give me Yours.”
Enter Long-Term Faith-Based Discipleship Short rehabs often fail. Commit to 7–12 months living with believers. Do life together.
For local recovery coaching and referrals to long-term programs, contact Shenandoah Valley Adult Teen Challenge at 540-213-0571.
Embrace Trials as Refinement Consider it joy (James 1:2–4). Perseverance finishes the work → maturity, lacking nothing.
Return to First-Love Intimacy Secret place daily. Abide. Behold His beauty. Fall in love again—no religious performance.
Heal Your Image of God and Self Nothing separates from His love. You’re qualified, chosen. He finishes what He starts.
Be Vulnerable in Community Model transparency. Create safe spaces. Admit weakness—boast in it (2 Corinthians 12:9).
Disciple Others Rawly Live life together. Your victory guides others. Follow Jesus → become fishers of men.
Trust He Works All Things Together Highs, lows, setbacks—He refines. Overplay of enemy draws you closer.
Conclusion: Costly Grace Leads to Maturity and Purpose
Curtis Palaski’s journey—from heroin bottom to directing a Hope Home, restored family, preaching—proves relapse cycles break when we embrace costly grace.
Not cheap grace without cross or discipleship.
But grace that calls us to follow—then empowers us to.
Trials refine. Secret place sustains. Community heals.
God pursues relentlessly. He finishes what He starts.
You’re not too far gone. Relapse isn’t your identity.
Whom the Son sets free is free indeed (John 8:36).
Surrender the detours today. Let Him make your crooked paths straight.
Many find sobriety but not peace—read more in Finding Peace in Recovery: Why Sobriety Doesn’t Automatically Bring Peace of Mind.
For a complete roadmap to rebuilding, see the Complete Guide to Freedom.
Subscribe to the channel, scroll previous episodes for more transformed lives, and comment below: How has embracing trials changed your walk?
God’s got it all worked out. Trust Him.
