For a while, you had suspicions. The signs were there: late nights, missing paychecks, bloodshot eyes, erratic behavior. Then, the undeniable evidence surfaced: you caught them in the act or discovered drugs. Such a revelation can shake any parent to the core. Realizing that your child is battling addiction triggers a profound grief, akin to mourning a loss. Depending on the depth of the addiction, parents may grapple with the stages of grief.
Denial – The immediate reaction is often disbelief. “My child wouldn’t do this.” “They know better.” Denial serves as a defense mechanism against distressing news.
Anger – It’s natural to feel anger, but it’s vital to channel it productively. When directed properly, anger can be a catalyst for establishing boundaries. Misdirected anger, however, can lead to regrettable decisions.
Bargaining – Here, the temptation to enable surfaces. Some might even try to strike deals with God, hoping that heightened devotion might save their loved one.
Depression – A sense of hopelessness may set in, leading to the belief that recovery is unattainable. It’s crucial during this phase to seek hope. While this depression is typically transient, without hope, it might intensify.
Acceptance – At this stage, parents come to terms with the reality and entrust their child to a higher power, much like the father in the Parable of the Prodigal Son (Luke 15:11-32). The son’s request for his inheritance was akin to wishing his father dead. The pain the father must have felt is unimaginable. In a time without modern communication tools, he had no updates on his son’s well-being. Yet, he trusted in a higher plan. He didn’t chase after his son; he respected his choices and awaited his return.
No matter your stage of grief, it’s essential to find a supportive community. As you progress towards acceptance and entrust your child to a higher power, you’ll be prepared to celebrate when they find their way back.
