He Faced Arson Charges and Still Chose Recovery

Hey, thanks so much for jumping in and checking out today's episode of the podcast where I sit down with my friend John Selby and he tells his story of rebuilding his life after addiction and some of the challenges he faced. Hope you enjoyed the episode. Now, we've known each other for quite a while now—I mean, it's got to be at least what, 15 years? Almost 16 years. Oh my goodness, we're almost 16. Yeah, that's crazy. And we share a birthday—same exact day, which is crazy. I know one other guy—I know he's not with us anymore; he's older. Jim—they passed on a couple years ago—but also had the same birthday. So I knew two people with birthdays on the same exact day that we share. That's wow—which is crazy. But yeah, we met in Teen Challenge. You have an incredible testimony of that part of your life, and I didn't really want to talk about that today because I think that—like both of us as former addicts on the other side of that—we've grown beyond that part of our testimonies. Yes, a hundred percent. Right? And so sometimes it can get easy to get clicks and get people to tune into a conversation when you start talking about all the gory drug details. But I don't think people think about the challenge of building life on the other side of addiction—not only putting all the pieces together, but man, my battles today aren't drugs anymore. I am an average dude trying to figure out how to raise four girls, trying to figure out how to put all these pieces into my life. I was thinking about something before we got together. I preached on Sunday about Elijah in his journey to Zarephath—when he was at the ravine with the ravens and all that stuff. He really had to rely on God in that season. But what I talked about was how God took Elijah to this wilderness—He cut him off for a season. That word actually means grief, means to be cut off. Man, it really made me think about your journey—before you got married, before you had kids, after Teen Challenge. You came back to Teen Challenge; you were getting ready to serve. You were excited to serve. I almost likened that story to Elijah: he went to give the word to Ahab, and then all of a sudden—boom—God just cuts him off from the world. I remember your accident, and I just wanted to talk about that for a little bit because I think it was number one—that part of your story is so relevant for what I preached on Sunday—but I also think that it did something incredible in you to set you up for the long-term success. So maybe—for those who aren't familiar, but I know people aren't familiar with what happened—would you mind sharing kind of what took place? What cut you off from the world, if you will? Well, oh—you're talking about the accident, right? Yeah. Well, I mean, before I came over here I said, "Man, it's been almost 16 years." I found myself—I said, "Wow, 16 years ago I was... I had just pretty much almost—I pretty much now hit rock bottom 16 years ago today." And then I thought, "Man, 16 years ago my parents were wondering, 'What are we going to do with John?'" And then, you know, I mean it was that point God—I think—started beginning to... He allowed me to hit that rock bottom so He could begin a new work in me. And then what—the accident—we were on our way to Annie's birthday party actually. We were on the way here. And then we had a head-on collision. It cracked my L2-L3 vertebrae. My dad and I had the same breakage in our back. It cracked my mom's femur, laceration to my liver. I had brain hemorrhaging. And then of course we had to go to the hospital. And then of course I was shortly after graduated Teen Challenge. And then I knew a lot of times when you go to the hospital like that, you get these painkillers and these—you know—just the stuff to control the pain. And at that point I was almost—not fresh out of Teen Challenge, I guess fresh out of Teen Challenge. Yeah, I don't know if you had barely started your internship. I think you'd been helping the ministry out for a month or two and I think you were committed on for a while. But then all of a sudden this—this obviously—this thing happens and completely redirects what's going to happen in your life. And yeah, you went to the hospital. I don't get to talk about this to a lot of people, but I remember showing up at the hospital and hearing the doctor or somebody in the room tell me that you were adamant about refusing the painkillers. And like—listen, I'm a wimp, okay? L2 and L3, brain hemorrhaging, all this stuff going on—like at that type of resolve was what always impressed me. Like, man, my freedom and what I have in Christ is so important to me. Yeah, because I was just so scared. At that point I was in ICU overnight. They were debating on whether they should operate on my back or not. They were kind of in the air. They fit me for a cast that I had to wear other than sitting up or being on my back—that's the only time I could take it off. But the nurse would come and, "How's your pain?" I would kind of force a lie: "I'm good." Yeah, the whole time it was just killing me. But I was so scared because every time I wanted to make that choice to say I want a little bit of relief, I remember people coming in to Teen Challenge hooked on opioids, hooked on OxyContin, hooked on this because of the injury that they had sustained. And they said, "Well, they were taking it—let the doctor prescribe." And so after the hospital you go home, they say, "Here, take this every four hours, this every four hours, and good to go." And this thing—you know—they're constantly taking it. And that always ran through my mind about, you know, gosh, I'm afraid to do this because I'm afraid I'm going to start getting addicted. Because I mean, you know, the devil was saying that you're going to get addicted. But when Christ said, "I have set you free—you're free indeed"—I knew I was free from it, but I was afraid to get back into it. Yeah, and if that makes any sense. My flesh—then I remember you telling me—because I got to the point where when I said yes I needed some, they were having to give me way more than what I needed because I was waiting so long. The pain was just so much—so they were giving me more than what I should. And I remember you telling me, "Quit being so stubborn and let the doctors do what they need to do." He said that point I said, "God, I'm gonna have to do something." Yeah, you never—you're not going to hear a drug rehab director tell somebody too often to take pain pills. Pretty serious. But yeah, I mean that's just that point where I was just so scared because I was fresh out of Teen Challenge. I mean, they said Teen Challenge is to start until a year. And then during that visit in the hospital I met a friend—well, my wife now—but Amanda. And she told me not to say anything embarrassing so I kind of keep it low. But she—she was down for spring break and she was coming to the hospital, driving to UVA every day and coming to see me. Driving across that mountain every single day. So that's where y'all's relationship really pretty much started? Yeah, yeah. I mean 15—14 years later I never thought that we'd be married to her. Yeah, you'd have two kids. We have a daughter of seven—Addison—and we have Levi who's two. Yeah, so a seven-year-old and two-year-old. Never would have imagined my life. You know, it's interesting—like, you know, I don't—and God doesn't give sickness to people. I know that's not the Scripture—He doesn't cause accidents to happen in our lives. I don't think God directed that car. But I'm always amazed to see how—we talk about all things work together for the good—and how in those seasons of like entire life plan changed, you're now going to have to go through this tremendous recovery process and have to walk through all that. But yet in that moment—like number one, your sobriety and your freedom from addiction is tested a little bit with the opioids. How much resolve do I really have? And all of that—and that's all reasonable. But then also in that moment—like you meet your wife. Yeah, you know—and I think there's more to the story, right? Like with your probation and your fines and how like you had some pretty significant restitution to pay off. Probation—challenge—I got two felony charges on me and they end up being restitution of fifty-six thousand dollars I had to pay. Yeah. And then—but during that accident, I never thought that the outcome would be what it is. You know, and I believe—like you said—the sobriety was tested. You know, and I believe God had His hand on me because of my mindset. I was cautious—knowing where I've been and then what could lead to a spiraling addiction downhill if I didn't continue relying on Him—if I didn't continue to say, "Hey, look, once this pain is under control—once you get to where I can just take ibuprofen and stuff like that—I'm gonna ditch this stuff. I'm not going to continue. I'm not going to continue letting the doctor say here take a little more of this, take a little more of that. I'm not going to continue to do that." And at that point, I mean—if that accident would have happened—would Amanda—would she have—would I have even crossed paths with her anymore? You know what I mean? For a week straight she came to the hospital every day—she was there. And then, you know, I mean she even visited me when I was back home. You know what I mean? That's six-hour drive. Wow. But the restitution—and then got him at a wedding where I was able to pay that off. And the probation was 99 years—that's what the judge gave me. I remember in the courtroom I was walking over with four other guys and we were sitting—we were all chained together while I was in jail because I did—you know—three months and 13 days in jail when I went for my sentencing. Yeah, and I remember you took me from Teen Challenge and dude—that was a long drive back alone. You punk. Listen—less we went to Chili's and said, "Hey, how's it going to be your last meal?" Right? And the whole time—the judge put me in jail and I had to stay there and you had to take that long dreaded drive home. Yeah, here I was in jail—right after Teen Challenge, man. Here I was sitting in jail realizing, you know—I said, "Well, your sins catch up to you." Even though I was free—even though I was a newborn Christian—I still had to deal with that. I had to deal with the consequences. 100%. You know what I mean? Everybody in life deals with consequences—which I tell my kids all the time. You know what I mean? And that's challenging too, right? Because I think—probably through the course—and I don't know—I can't think of specific people—but I've seen people come through TC with charges a lot worse and not have to do a day. Yeah, and like—so like you're at the end of your program—you've done a year plus already. Yeah, I graduated June 25th and went to jail July 10th and got out October 23rd—three months and 13 days. And you know what I mean—my faith was tested in there—definitely—100% definitely. I had—because my charges were violent—they were setting it up to where I wasn't going home that day. My probation officer said, "Hey, look—we're going to set you up to go to a prison boot camp because they're not going to send you to Teen Challenge—you already went there." So I'm thinking, "Oh my Lord—zero—I am at everything set up—shops and everything." And then my lawyer said, "You're not—you know—don't look forward to going home today. You're probably not going to go home." And then I remember the judge sentenced me to 10 years to the arson charge and 10 years to the break and entering—run consecutive back to back. I was suspended—but time served. They always pause, right? They sentence you first—they pause—then they tell you it's suspended. Yeah, I mean—and then—but prior to that I was just pleading to God while I was waiting to be seen in a room. They bring you with four other people and then all four of them people got rejected—bombed. So I'm thinking—and then prior to that when I was sitting there I just sent somebody else to 15 years. Wow. And here I'm sitting here thinking, "Oh my gosh—what is—what's gonna..." I'm sitting there pleading to God while I was shackled up in a room—probably about this size—before I go into the courtroom. And then just—you know—also something about time served. And then I continued my journey with Teen Challenge. And then, you know—I was still—you know—I hadn't met Amanda yet. You know, and I was just praying for God—"God, what's the next step in my life? I need to know. You've gotten me through this—I know You're not gonna leave me hanging now." So but at that point I was pretty much forced to rely on Him. You know—what's my next step in life? It's interesting to see how all that ties together because—like you know—TC, the jail sentence, the probation, the restitution. And then now it's like, okay—now I'm starting to rebuild my life. You're starting to rebuild your life—trying to figure out, okay—how do I be faithful in the ministry? Because you had a desire to serve in the ministry. But then also—by the way—I've got to earn money over here because the court's gonna want their money. And then in the middle of all that—this life-changing accident happens. And now you're faced with a whole nother set of challenges to test the faith. And like—that's a lot—back to back to back. And then you lived it, you know. But you said—but like that's a lot for somebody—especially fresh in their recovery—to be tested with all that back to back to back. And so you guys go home after the accident—you're going on this journey of recovery and come out on the other side of that. And so fifty-six thousand dollars in restitution—how did—how did the Lord work all that out for you in regards to providing when you're trusting Him? Well, we had a settlement with that, you know. And that was able to help pave the way for that. How did that feel to go into the office and write a check? It felt great. And the first thing that came to my mind was—you gotta tithe it. What? No. Yeah, you know—because I'm thinking like man—is it income from work or is it income from this? Right? And now you—you got it tithed. Yeah. And writing—I don't know if you want to add this out—writing a fourteen-thousand-dollar check to a church. Wow. I mean—but big deal—I mean it is what it is. Yeah, you know—so there's what—60 going? Yeah, you know. But you walk through this journey though and you're talking about—like even going back to what I mentioned with the sermon I preached on Sunday about Elijah—like I'm gonna feed you by a raven—like okay, thanks God—like this is—you know—like I got—I don't read the Bible like that because I like—I try to put those pieces together—like what is this—what is this going to look like? And then Elijah is there—God's sending the raven—the provision's there—the brook's getting ready to dry up because Elijah had just prophesied a drought. And then God's like, okay—now go to this next town and go talk to a widow—like she's broke—like she's in a drought—she probably don't have food—she probably don't have good water. But God is like—Elijah—take the next step—take the next step and show Me your faithful obedience—your ability to depend on Me to be your source of provision. And it's almost like I hear you—like saying that—you know—it's like okay God—here's the next step. I don't know how I'm going to reconcile paying off my fines and getting restitution and I know You called me to go serve in this ministry for this season—so I'm just going to take the next step. Yeah. And then during that season it's like oh crap—I just got head-on collision by a car—entire life has changed overnight. But yet—okay God—I know in this moment my freedom—I need to stay faithful to this. I'm just going to be obedient. And you meet your wife. And then the Lord blesses that faithfulness—because I know the settlement didn't happen for like—what—a year or so at least? Yeah—so you had plenty of time to—I'm gonna say prove—not that God is looking for you to prove it—but almost show that you weren't going to be dependent on these pills. Like you broke off of those and moved on. Right? Yeah. And so it's just the faithfulness, dude—it's so—it's so awesome. Yeah. And I just—you know—give all the glory to God on that. You know—because when that money came in—you can immediately like oh my gosh—yeah—you know—oh my gosh. But you know—guys—like hold on—back up—it's not yours. You know—first you need to give Me Mine. You know—at the course—then I had to pay the fines. And then—what more—yet when I was pretty deep in my drug addiction I worked at a bowling alley. And he hired me because he knew my dad. And I think he kind of knew I was kind of a rough situation—he thought maybe hiring me would kind of help set me—but I was still in it. And I was stealing at this point—stealing from him—from the business. And then the last thing—you need to go and you need to pay back what you took. Wow—sorry—I'm like in my room. And I mean—that was hard. I've never heard this before. Oh no—no—this is the first time. I think I never told Amanda. Yeah—that was hard. So I'm thinking like man—you know—God said well it's not yours. And you not only stole from him—from the business—from the family—because at that point he had two kids—probably around Addison's age maybe now. And then—you know—he said well—you need to make that right. Sorry—I'm like in my room. And I mean—that was hard. So I'm thinking like man—you know—God said well it's not yours. And you not only stole from him—from the business—from the family—because at that point he had two kids—probably around Addison's age maybe now. And then you know—he said well—you need to make that right. Yeah—so I'm thinking like oh Lord—you know—because he fired me on the spot—you know—you know—have fun with the two thousand dollars you stole from me. He never called the police on you or anything? No—no—no—no. So how was his reaction when you went and made it right? Oh yeah—so say this out—so I call him on the phone right—hey this is so-and-so—you know—I want to come talk to you—you know. Okay—I was nervous—my hands were clammy. So I went to the bank and pulled the money out. And here I wanted to explain my story to him first before coming to it—here—because you know—he didn't—at this point he probably didn't know that I—that was Teen Challenge—well I mean somebody else who knows. So before I did that I wanted to explain my story so he's not so reluctant on taking the money—because I feel that he needed to have this money. You know—either him or somebody's taking it—because I got to give it back to God—just saying it out of your hands. Yeah—pretty much. And you know—he would just—I mean he was at all on what changed me—and that I actually came back—wow—and gave it back to him. You know—because I explained—I said not only did I steal it from you or the business—but I stole from your whole family. You know—and that is almost like a release. Yeah—wow. And then—and then during that transition I was serving in the—as a youth for the church I was going to at that time—that I wrote the big check. Oh yeah—sure—you can do whatever. I hadn't said that—they didn't say that—but I was serving there—you know. And then still talking with Amanda—you know—having that long-distance relationship—figuring out—you know—still what to do in life—you know—do I—am I—I knew I believe I was supposed to marry Amanda—you know—but how is this going to work—with am I going to live back in my hometown or am I going to live down here? You know—so I was contemplating—I don't know what to do—you know. And then one night I was driving around and we were pretty serious at this point—you know—I mean I think we were engaged. And then God—I don't know what to do here—it was again still kind of rebuild my life. And God—I need You—I need You—you know—no matter—I don't think no amount of money in the world—if you're a Christ follower—you know—you can't depend on the money. You know what I mean—because you can't buy everything—right? You know—I think like God—I—I—I don't know what to do now—you know. So I was driving around the private community that I worked in. And then I was like man—I just need—I just need a sign now—God—You're gonna have to give me something. You know—what do I stay down here and start my family down here or do I come up here to the Shenandoah Valley? And then the youth night—it happened to where somebody was able to step in that role. And I almost kind of gave me confirmation—said hey—I think—I think now this is—this is the time to leave. Yeah—you know. Man—I was thinking—like as you were talking about going back and like making restitution right—and that being a part of your journey—and the Lord very clearly speaking to you and saying like give this money away—like it's not yours—you know. And I think there's so much there—but I think that a lot of times we come to the cross and lay our sins before God—they're wiped away as far as the east is from the west—and that's amazing. But a lot of times I think people miss the part that just because God's forgiven us doesn't mean we've made everything right with the people that we hurt. And I think sometimes we gloss over that—you know. And to be able to not only walk this faith journey—but then be in a position that like you—you know—you probably could have just—whatever—it's been so long—he probably doesn't care anymore—you know—and he might have moved on. But the testimony to come forth—not only of the power of Jesus working in your life—but then the integrity piece to go back—like what an amazing story—what an amazing testimony for the Kingdom of God. You know—because a lot of times we—well it's all about Jesus—all about His will—but then we don't think about the people that we've wronged—and like fixing that. Like that's the best sermon we could ever preach—you know what I'm saying? And then like—I don't—I don't know—I would think that it probably changed that guy's life—at least something about his life—then one of the money—the money is inconsequential—but the act. Yeah—you know. And I don't know how—I don't know if he's a Christian—I don't know much about him at all—but that act probably told him everything he needs to know about Jesus. Yeah—I believe—I mean—I've hurt a lot of people—you know—a lot of that—relationships. But some of the times I thought—you know—look back—because I struggled with that—even my dad said—you know—because what I did to him—you know what I'm saying—you know—how it happened—how it transpired—how it went down—he merely fired me—you know—he said don't you ever show your face up here again. Of course then I—you know—of course I got scared at that point because I was—you know—paranoid and all that. And they're like—I don't—I don't know if you should—maybe—you know—I think they may be wrong—but I think they mentioned about maybe some mailing something to them—but I'm like I got to do this face to face. Yeah—I was scared—I was nervous—I didn't know how—how I was all gonna—I don't know if you're gonna say I don't want to see your face here ever again—you know—leave. I know how all that was going to transpire—but I know I had to make that one right—even though I messed up relation—toxic relationships—I believe that it probably wasn't best for me to even try to even go back and restore those—you know—because it was toxic anyway. Yeah—yeah—it's that word from the Lord though—right? It's like I gotta—I gotta leave the brook—right—you know. And it's—it's maybe not exactly the same—but yeah—but look—I gotta go—like the Lord is telling me to move from this place where I am to this place over here. And I don't know what's going to happen on the other end. Yeah—I don't know the reaction—I have no clue that the widow's gonna have these endless jars of oil that just show up on the other side of it. But all I know is I have to take the journey to the next spot—I gotta do it. Yeah—and it's that obedience—right—and that man—that is such a—it's such a vital part of the faith that—that—that people miss. Like when the Lord speaks—we don't get to negotiate—you know—I try—it just didn't work. Like I don't know—I've been having this conversation with my kids this week that like—you know—delayed obedience is really disobedience. And—and at times—like—and I think there are times God gives us grace on all of that—but for us—like I said—man—I want to be able to be in that position—you know—like—like you're talking about—like something as would seem as trivial as two thousand dollars that has been moved on—it's probably been forgotten about and moved on—then be faithful enough with my testimony—not before people—but before God—like well I haven't told anybody about the sons in my family and Amanda—you didn't do it for attention—it was obedience to the Lord very clearly. And like—again—now that testimony is going to go out—you know—we never plan—right? Yes—yeah. But you know what man—it's—it's been so long and it's—it's not—it's not a thing where you're—you're giving to get the attention before man—but now 10 years—however many years removed—it's a testimony of the Lord's faithfulness. And I think—I think those stories inspire other people to have a little bit of courage—you know—to make those bold moves of obedience—you know. And that—that's a big thing. So you're married now—kids and all that—so house parenting—right—on the other side of all this—man—I thought of allowing God—but now with the parenting—it's—it's a blessing. I'm not gonna lie—I mean—it's—I love it—I love my kids—I love my wife. My wife's the best thing that probably ever happened to me—yeah—besides my salvation. The parenting—I mean—it's—it's hard and challenging at times—but I wouldn't trade it for the world. Yeah—and just the—just—just trying to parent the way God wants me to do—yeah—and also hoping we don't mess 'em up. Yes—I mean—my daughter is just—just like me. Yeah—looks like her mom—thank God—but just like me. So we—I mean—we're at a stage now where it's just—I can't—I can't shut up when it's time to say—you know—hey—you know—when you do this—she says something out far back. Yeah—you know—but—but out of all the flaws—I want her to see that—that—that just because of my father—I'm not perfect—right? And I'd like for her to see—see my flaws—yeah—because the moment she messes up—she's—it's—it's good to feel that—that natural guilt—that—that natural guilt—I mean—it's conviction—right—good for the—yeah—that natural conviction. Yeah—and knowing her dad is not—even though she has no clue what my testimony is at this point—yeah—because she's too young—yeah—for sure—but it's good that her—see my imperfections as well—because I—I'm by far perfect. Yeah—I try—I try to be a great dad—but I'm far from being perfect. Yeah—that came up on my Facebook page the other day—I shared a post about—Chloe had a homeschool project about the family tree and wanting to ask about the past and all that. And like—you know—at Chloe's 13—different contacts—I'm not giving this answer to a five-year-old—for those who are watching—but you know—Chloe's like—what did you do after high school? I did meth. And Ashley just gives me this look—and she knows—like my girls haven't—like they haven't been shielded from this. They've been at every Teen Challenge choir service for—you know—for their lifetime. And that includes some of the choir services where you've got the saved-not-sanctified student sharing—you know—and language hasn't quite caught up to their belief in the Bible and all that. And so like—people say things from the stage that as the leader you like climb under the chairs. So they've been in some of those services. But like—if somebody commented—and it was a great comment—that you know—she said—in the comments—she said well—you don't hide it from them. I feel like we should—you know—it would be better for our kids to learn this from us than from the world. And I'm like—well—of course my kids have known about it—I was just more feeling awkward—like I'm glad this paper doesn't have to go to a teacher—like like we're homeschoolers. And so—but where do you stand on that—like would you plan on sharing parts of your testimony—all of your testimony? She—um—I don't know—I—I can't remember how Addison—but Addison knew I went to jail. Okay—now—now I can't remember how that transpired—how that even got to her—but she's asked me numerous times—dad—can you tell me why you went to jail? I said—not right now—you know what I'm saying—when you get older—12 or when I'm eight—no—when you're a little older—you know—12—13—when you're a teenager—when you can understand. But I just told her like—daddy—this is bad decisions—he made some mistakes. Yeah—you know—and you just had to live with it—you know. And I told her like—I'd tell her like—you know—sometimes we have to live with the consequences—you know—of our actions—whether we like them or not. And we try to do that with life with her now—you know—when she does something now and it's hard for her to face the consequences—you know—like no tablet for 24 hours or something like that—you know. And we try to tell her that—hey—we're protecting you now—because if daddy acts like this at work—he's not gonna get a tablet—technically he's probably going to lose his job—you know what I'm saying—so it's—it's worse when you're an adult. Yeah—so we try to shelter you from that—or actually make you learn by the consequences based on your actions as a child. Yeah—of course you don't do the same consequences as an adult for a truck—you know what I'm saying—if that makes any sense. It does—yeah. So we try to do that—open your kid up—but yeah—yeah. And Amanda does a whole lot better than I do—I mean—I'm—I'm struggling that aspect—I'm struggling—yeah—discipline. Yeah—it's hard—it's not my forte. Disciplining kids is like trying to figure that process. So it's not just—it's not just corrective action—but there's like—there's like growth—you know—it's like we want to not just correct the behavior—but help them grow through it too. And that—and it's difficult—man—because like—you know—we've got four kids in the house—three—one of them is only one—you know—she's—she's not being disciplined right—she's not being corrected—but like the other three—all of them respond differently too—you know. I even noticed—since we were—we were dealing with an issue the other night—one of my girls—she—she gets gangster—just doesn't care—she just kind of slouches down in the chair when you're correcting her and all that—you know—and it's just like—shuts down—it's not even a shutdown—it's just like—okay—I'm done with this now—you're almost like—okay—now what—you know—that type of—that behavior. The other one is very emotional and it's like—the entire world is being stripped away from her because she's being corrected. And they're like—those are two extremes—you know—and like trying to figure out how to correct both—but meet them where they're at—and where their emotions are—and how they process things—is—is—is interesting. And I—I'm learning too—I'm with you—man—like my wife is a godsend on all that—like because—you know—yeah—she—she's got the patience with the children and I'm—I'm a pretty patient guy as well—but like I don't know—I just—yeah—I don't know—this—I keep—you know—she said that—I said something right—you know what I'm saying—we're back and forth—you know. And—and when she does something and then Levi sees that—and then of course she gets corrected—but Levi's two—right—you know—so she gets the consequence—well why doesn't Levi get this—why does he do it? Yeah—because he's—you know—he doesn't understand yet—you know—you know—we're starting a little bit. And that reminds me of when I was—you know—like as you're growing up as a—as a immature Christian—you know what I'm saying—the—it's a whole lot different—you know—when—when you do something that God corrects you—you know—based on—when you know more and you know what you should or shouldn't be doing—you know—you have more knowledge of it—yeah—and you still do it anyway—yeah—it kind of like—the consequences a little more rougher—you know what I'm saying—sure—when you could be doing it when you first—first out of—you know—you know—Bible College—you know what I'm saying—and then—and then as immature—you know—it just—it's a whole lot different—you know what I'm saying. That's why I try to explain to her—you know—and then of course I just—you know—keep talking—talking—talking—it just doesn't work out—she tunes it out and just kind of just—yeah—yeah. That discipline stuff—man—is—is challenging. I had—I told Ashley—Ashley quoted me my sermon the other day while we were correcting—and I was like—I'm like I appreciate that—but like—no—like—like please—not in the living room—they're never going to want to listen to me preach again. No—no—but it's—it's good—man—because we—our church—we do it—the teenagers are in the sanctuary—we don't have youth on Sunday mornings. And I'm pretty down—I try to be pretty down to earth—I tell a lot of stories—try to be relatable—so teens can sit in there. And so the girls hear it anyways—and that connection piece—and they're at that age now where they're a little bit older—like I gave them—I gave them assignments to go to the Bible the other night and look up some scriptures on work ethic and on—you know—servant leadership and being a good servant and—you know—taking initiative and all that stuff. And I said—go give me four scriptures on work ethic. And—I asked for it because I should have been a little more clear—three out of the four scriptures had the word slave in it when they brought it back to me. And I'm like—okay—great—I'm like now tell me why you picked that—other than the word slave—because you are our children. And so that—that was pretty funny—man. No—man—well I—I think John I think we'll probably—yeah—we'll probably wrap up. I can cut the little bit out—but man—I appreciate you just getting together and just kind of sharing—you know—we talked beforehand—didn't really know what direction the conversation was going to go. And—I really enjoyed the piece—like even learning something new about you—like you know—tonight—like it's pretty amazing—dude. And—like I hope those who are—who are listening just kind of engage with the—the testimony of faithfulness that you see here—like it's one thing to talk about obedience to the Lord—but like—and not—not to say that John didn't even—he admitted that he struggled with it at times—like it's—it's a process of learning that obedience—but I think the more we learn to just be obedient to the Lord in the small things—you know—the Bible says faithful in little—faithful in much—we begin to see His provision show up at every turn. And like John's testimony—man—even not even just the drugs—I mean that was a miracle in and of itself—but then everything that happened afterwards—you're just seeing a lifetime of faithfulness. And man—I'm—I'm grateful to call you a friend and I'm honored to see what the Lord has done in your life. It's just like—like your testimony before people and before the Lord is phenomenal—man. And so—um—I appreciate you and well done—like continuing to run the course—man—and stay faithful before the Lord. It's an awesome day. And if you're in the Staunton area—John is youth pastor over at Calvary Assembly of God on Spring Hill Road. So I know I've got people that watch from all over the country—but if you happen to be in the local area—go check the church out. They meet on the weekends—10:30—10:30—10:30 on Sunday. So hey—um—thank you guys for tuning in. John—thank you again for being here. Thank you. Thanks so much for taking the time to check out this clip. If you enjoyed this—you can catch another clip here—or you can click here for the full episode. Have a great day.